From Someone to No One

The world these days is a depressing place. I have found myself reading less and less news. I am not naive enough to think that this particular cultural and political stew is the worst we’ve ever brewed, but I do think it’s the worst we’ve ever been so cognizant and aware of. As a consequence, I think the best strategy one can employ in this world is to become a “nobody.” I’ve set that as a new retirement goal; to become “no one.”

One of Emily Dickinson’s most famous poems has the opening line “I’m Nobody! Who are you?” While I am not a tremendous fan of Emily’s work, I do like the ideas expressed in this short work. In particular, the last line – “To an admiring bog” – has such a modern ring to it. Social media has turned society into a festering bog of recrimination, faux outrage, self-promotion, and any number of sordid ills. It’s a festering digital bog out there, and none of it is of interest to me.

I have taken a part-time job as a driver for a large rental car company, and my duties consist of moving cars from one location to another, either because they were bought or are being sold. It’s a nice job; minimum wage, no thinking at all, no stress, and when I clock out, no work to bring home. As one of my new colleagues put it, “I get paid from the neck down.” It’s a “nobody” job, perfect for someone without ambition. Occasionally the company I keep is not of my personal liking, but overall I do spend a good deal of time alone behind the wheel of a car. There is scenery to see, which, although repetitious, is never the same. I work three days a week, which I think is perhaps a bit much. Two would be better. I think I will hold this job through the winter and as far into the spring as possible, but I do not see it being long-term. It’s something to fill the time as I wait for King Lear to begin. I’m pretty sure doing both Lear and holding down this job would be pretty impossible, and then there is always the travel I’d like to do. Having a job would just get in the way of that, so probably by August 2018 I will be jobless again.

I am also in the process of collecting my haiku into a self-published book. I do not know what is motivating this other than the desire to have a hard copy of some of my haiku, something I can hold in my hand and call my own. I know I would like to write more, and at some point in time I think the time will come when writing will become my primary occupation. I sense a long interior journey in the offing, but for now, the need to reduce my personal footprint in the world is my primary goal. Less social media, less interaction with events in the world; more writing. more introspection. If retirement has any benefits, it is the benefit of having the freedom to care much, much less.  -twl